Latest freak out.

I'm tired of hating myself. I don't truly hate myself. I hate when I get on the scale. I see those numbers and I get all paranoid cuz I'm supposed to be like 30 lbs thinner.





Then I start to critique everything about myself. Why do I love food so much that I can't just fast? Or purge? Why won't my body respond to exercise? I've been going to the gym every day...okay not everyday but most days for the past 2 weeks. Okay, so 2 weeks isn't enough. I'd go now but somehow I injured my ankle.

I"m finally off. I finally get to live some life. I plan on not wasting this. I have to paint first off. Secondly, I need to tan and get some sun. Thirdly, work out like a fiend.

You know what was great about today? I met some lovely girls. I wish I had sisters. They were really nice. I hope we stay in contact with each other.

My birthday is next week. I know that life is a journey and not a destination but man I had plans. Big plans for 28.

I'm still young. That's not too bad. I gotta calm down about that.