How?
Well, one, I've been here before. If you're going through some shit, let me help you. I know some tips that might work.
Happiness is a state of mind (but please don't say this to someone who is severely depressed. It's not the same thing. They are trying the best they can. It's not a choice for them. It's cruel to tell them this).
But if you have situational depression, where it's mild (and not the kind where you're begging on your knees for God to end you already), then yeah try these things. They might help.
Here's what will work and I'll use myself to expound on the idea.
1. Express Gratitude: Never let the things you WANT make you forget about the things you HAVE.
I'm incredibly lucky. I look around and I am humbled by my blessings. I have health, I have love, I have brains. It'll be okay. I have everything I already need.
2. Savor Life's Joys: The real beauty of life is in each precious moment. Stop and smell the roses. Or in my case, watch the birds.
I'm way into gardening. And that means I get to watch the birds and butterflies flit around my backyard. Watching them pleases me and takes me out of my head. I don't know what it is about those little creatures but it's a spiritual thing when I see them flying.
3. Commit to your Goals: It's not from lack of ability, but lack of commitment that people fail at reaching their goals.
More than ever, I need to keep my eye on the prize. The writing. That little monkey has to stay on my back no matter how irritating it is right now. I do love it, but editing is hard. I need to stop bitching that it's hard and put on my big girl panties and just do it. If there's something you were trying to do before your situation, don't put it away. This is the time to try even harder.
4. Cultivate Optimism: Stay Positive. When it rains, look for rainbows. When it's dark, look for stars.
Everything will be alright. Somehow, it always ends up working out. It's a very short life. I have already lived 289,000 hours. I don't think I'll have that amount left to live. Maybe 200,000, if I'm lucky. I'm going to laugh and enjoy the rest of it while I can. I am so so lucky to have woken up this morning.
5. Stop Over-Thinking: Thinking too much complicates your life and creates problems that weren't even there to begin with.
Meditation helps with this one. Staying still and focusing my mind into emptying is a daily thing I do. In the beginning, it was not fun. There are still some days it's not fun. But I do notice a difference in how I feel the rest of the day. I'm calmer and not such a slave to anger or anxiety. Try it. Sit down and breath. Start with 3 minutes. That's only one hundred and eighty seconds. You can do that. Then work your way up to five minutes, then ten, then twenty.
6. Avoid Social comparison: you're comparing someone's highlight reel to your current state. It's pointless and unfair to you.
I'm usually pretty good with this one, but if you've been reading this blog, then you know I fell off the wagon last week. I fell off the wagon and landed on a big steaming pile of dung pie. Funny thing was, I thought I had mastered this, but I guess not. Do not compare. Just don't do it. It's a waste of those precious minutes you have left.
7. Increase Flow Experience. Doing what you love and challenging yourself.
This is painting for me. I mean, writing too, for sure, but the quickest way for me to achieve flow is painting. The moment I touch that brush, I'm there. It's the best feeling in the world. I am the best version of myself when I paint. Perfection doesn't exist. It's just pure expression. It's awesome. Everyone should try it. I know I'm going to be doing more of that in the coming days.
8. Nurture Your Relationships: Cultivate deep meaningful relationships.
I have a tight inner circle of friends. Found family, I like to call them. They keep me grounded, they motivate me, they love me. They think I'm amazing and see my best qualities. Even when I stumble and fall, they still love me. They call me their Sunshine, because they see me as the girl who's always smiling.
You have your own tribe. This is the time to surround yourself with them. Not to use them, but to be a friend to them. Spend time with them. Cherish them. How lucky you are to have someone in your life.
Alrighty, I think I'm done. Hope you are well and happy.
Be kind to each other.
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